'American Idol' Recap: Teary David Cook, Powerful David Archuleta Master Mariah Carey Night
Jason chills, Carly wails, Syesha shouts, Brooke shakes and Kristy Lee continues her OK streak.
Question: When it comes to picking a song on "American Idol," whose catalog, aside from Whitney's, Aretha's and Celine's, should you avoid at all costs?
Answer: That of Tuesday night's guest mentor (who also happens to be MTV's Artist of the Week), Mariah Carey!
Devoting an entire night to an artist the contestants are never able to top makes about as much sense as Mariah hijacking Einstein's theory of relativity for an album title. But I suppose if producers are ready to go off the deep end, Mariah Carey's the perfect person with whom to do it.
Mimi actually turned out to be a pretty awesome coach. She was in great spirits while working with the contestants and displayed little of the, um, offbeat charm we all witnessed during that infamous "Cribs" episode. There were no wardrobe changes, no impromptu stripteases and no diva attitude (aside from that whole "you can only film my right side" thing). She even hugged Jason "Looks Like a Homeless Dude" Castro! All in all, Mariah acted more like a seasoned songwriter than an eccentric millionaire, which was great news for the top seven, but bad for jerks like me who make a living by poking fun at pop culture.
So, to earn my paycheck, I'll pepper my recap with hypothetical Mariah-isms that could have happened, had "Idol" asked her to mentor the contestants back in the good old crazy days of 2001-02. (Just so you don't get mixed up with current, sane MC, these fantasies will be in italics.)
Ryan Seacrest opened Tuesday's show by blaming Michael Johns' surprise departure on viewers not voting last week. Hey, Seacrest, nobody called in because last year you set the precedent that you wouldn't kick anyone off during "Idol Gives Back" week. Don't crap in our dinner and then ask why we aren't eating it!
continue...
Question: When it comes to picking a song on "American Idol," whose catalog, aside from Whitney's, Aretha's and Celine's, should you avoid at all costs?
Answer: That of Tuesday night's guest mentor (who also happens to be MTV's Artist of the Week), Mariah Carey!
Devoting an entire night to an artist the contestants are never able to top makes about as much sense as Mariah hijacking Einstein's theory of relativity for an album title. But I suppose if producers are ready to go off the deep end, Mariah Carey's the perfect person with whom to do it.
Mimi actually turned out to be a pretty awesome coach. She was in great spirits while working with the contestants and displayed little of the, um, offbeat charm we all witnessed during that infamous "Cribs" episode. There were no wardrobe changes, no impromptu stripteases and no diva attitude (aside from that whole "you can only film my right side" thing). She even hugged Jason "Looks Like a Homeless Dude" Castro! All in all, Mariah acted more like a seasoned songwriter than an eccentric millionaire, which was great news for the top seven, but bad for jerks like me who make a living by poking fun at pop culture.
So, to earn my paycheck, I'll pepper my recap with hypothetical Mariah-isms that could have happened, had "Idol" asked her to mentor the contestants back in the good old crazy days of 2001-02. (Just so you don't get mixed up with current, sane MC, these fantasies will be in italics.)
Ryan Seacrest opened Tuesday's show by blaming Michael Johns' surprise departure on viewers not voting last week. Hey, Seacrest, nobody called in because last year you set the precedent that you wouldn't kick anyone off during "Idol Gives Back" week. Don't crap in our dinner and then ask why we aren't eating it!
continue...
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