On the Scene: Idol Results Show
The palindrome is dead; all hail the palindrome. Yes, PopWatchers, just when I was starting to like her, Kristy Lee "KLK" Cook -- wide stance, Evita hands, MechaZilla survival skills and all -- was asked to leave Idol's dwindling island tonight, during an episode most remarkable for its complete mindfrak of an elimination construct. This was a night which will also forever live in infamy as the first and hopefully only time I'll be hypnotized into downloading an American Idol iTune. Damn you, David Cook, and your infernal talent. You're making me go all soft! Between your bizarrely appealing emo versions of cheesy songs I love and the persistent, itchy crush I've developed on Seacrest, I don't even know who I am anymore. What's next? I start watching Dancing with the Stars? I buy a Clay Aiken CD? I stop being totally creeped out by all these group numbers in which the Idol contestants sing about God and praying?
Okay, that last thing will never happen. But rather than launch into one of those rants you folks love so much -- this time featuring my strongly held belief that if I want to hear evangelical music, there are channels other than Fox for my doomed soul to surf, thank you very much, and hey, I wonder what God thinks of all the families that network tried to destroy with Moment of Truth? -- I'll just go ahead and start the rundown of what happened during today's taping, featuring none other than Ms. Mariah Carey herself. Join me after the jump, won't you? The Baby Jesus would want you to!
We were called to arrive at CBS Television City no later than 5 p.m. today lest we miss the Carey festivities, so I hustled my way to the studio, forgetting to leave my iPod and cell phone in the car. Of course, this was the one day they decided to clamp down on security, and next thing I knew, the iPod was confiscated. (Not the useful, show-stealing piece of technology, mind you -- just the lump of third-generation ancientness that plays host to my wide variety of angry music.) Once I took my seat, the long arm of the law came for me again: The CBS pages were out in force with their gum cups, trying to collect our minty freshness. Well. You can take my iPod, Idol, but you can't take my gum. As I sat there trying desperately not to move my jaw, I took a quick glance around the studio. Here is my tally of employees chewing gum:
continue...
Okay, that last thing will never happen. But rather than launch into one of those rants you folks love so much -- this time featuring my strongly held belief that if I want to hear evangelical music, there are channels other than Fox for my doomed soul to surf, thank you very much, and hey, I wonder what God thinks of all the families that network tried to destroy with Moment of Truth? -- I'll just go ahead and start the rundown of what happened during today's taping, featuring none other than Ms. Mariah Carey herself. Join me after the jump, won't you? The Baby Jesus would want you to!
We were called to arrive at CBS Television City no later than 5 p.m. today lest we miss the Carey festivities, so I hustled my way to the studio, forgetting to leave my iPod and cell phone in the car. Of course, this was the one day they decided to clamp down on security, and next thing I knew, the iPod was confiscated. (Not the useful, show-stealing piece of technology, mind you -- just the lump of third-generation ancientness that plays host to my wide variety of angry music.) Once I took my seat, the long arm of the law came for me again: The CBS pages were out in force with their gum cups, trying to collect our minty freshness. Well. You can take my iPod, Idol, but you can't take my gum. As I sat there trying desperately not to move my jaw, I took a quick glance around the studio. Here is my tally of employees chewing gum:
continue...
Comments
Post a Comment